“Snowball fight!”
The kids cheered and giggled as they rounded the corner of the apartment hallway near me. Like most winter days I was walking my dog inside, trying to stay warm and away from the big frozen ice cube that had become the world outside.
Within seconds the kids ran past me — snow pants, mittens, hats and all — and burst through the door, where their winter wonderland adventure could finally begin.
They smiled and laughed as they catapulted white blobs into the air.
I looked at them and furrowed my forehead, feeling dazed and confused. As an adult, there’s something about seeing children play in the snow that makes it hard for me to believe I ever reacted to winter in the same way.
Because here’s the honest truth: I don’t like winter anymore.
When we moved to Minnesota back in 2014, I put on a brave face and feebly embraced it. In my mind, if we were going to be true Minnesotans, I had to at least make an effort. I drove to the second-hand sports store and bought some hockey gear and snow boots. I let my hockey-playing honey re-teach me how to skate. I agreed to a two-hour, outdoor engagement photo shoot in February (he proposed to me on an icy lake in January).
I was all in. And then, suddenly I wasn’t.
I don’t know when it happened, but somewhere along the way I became a winter Grinch. I actually teared up when the first snowfall hit this year. And they weren’t tears of joy.
When I stepped outside, my thoughts immediately grew as cold as the temperatures outside.
So what’s a girl to do when she can’t seem to focus on anything but the negatives in life? She gets an attitude adjustment.
As much as I’d like to sit around and complain about winter, I know focusing on the negatives won’t get me anywhere.
I have to have a different perspective.
Maybe you’ve been in a situation where you can’t see anything but the negatives, too. It doesn’t have to be a disdain for winter, but the irritation is the same … that feeling of discontentment, despair and wanting things to be different than they actually are.
I think we all can learn a lesson from the kids who were having a snowball fight outside my apartment complex. And the lesson is this: Life is often what we make it.
Proverbs 4:23 tells us, “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.”
Guarding our heart means we have to first guard our mind. Because what the mind thinks influences how the heart feels. If our thoughts are cold and bitter, then you can guarantee our hearts will eventually grow cold and bitter, too.
Life is not just what we make it, but what we choose to focus on.
If you’re like me, it’s tempting to cop an attitude, complain or be negative when life doesn’t go your way.
But we don’t have to complain or focus on the negatives, because we’ve been given a choice. And that choice is to instead turn our eyes whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable (Philippians 4:8).
It’s the choice we make when we need to have a better perspective (or a total attitude adjustment).
I wrote about Philippians 4:8 in an article for iBelieve.com a few months ago, but today I want to talk about what it looks like to practically apply that verse to our lives.
Instead of being all “Bah! Humbug!” about something, we can use Philippians 4:8 to help us shift our thoughts and change our perspective.
Here’s what the exercise looks like (I’ll use my disdain for winter as an example): Just take the components of Philippians 4:8 and write out a positive thing to focus on for each category.
WHATEVER IS …
TRUE: Winter won’t last forever and soon I’ll be outside again.
NOBLE: Winter is an opportunity for me to be reminded of how amazing my husband is. He drops me off nearly everywhere we go!
RIGHT: Winter is a time to grow even closer to God, because more time inside means more chances to read the Word.
PURE: I might not like snow, but it’s a beautiful reminder of what Jesus did for us on the cross — He washed our sins white as snow!
LOVELY:The weather outside is frightful, but with my space heater the weather inside is perfect for writing.
ADMIRABLE: Winter brings with it my two favorite holidays.
And suddenly, winter doesn’t seem all that bad!
This is how we give ourselves a better perspective and an overall attitude adjustment. This is how we keep our hearts from growing cold and bitter. I hope this exercise encourages you, and I hope you’ll make it a part of your daily life.
We can feel negative emotions, but we don’t have to become a slave to them.
Pray with me: Lord, I confess that sometimes I choose to focus on the negatives, instead of focusing on what you’ve called me to focus on. Help me take the words of Philippians 4:8 to heart. In every moment of every day, help me focus on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely and admirable, so that my attitude may reflect and honor you. As I practice shifting my perspective, keep my heart from growing cold or bitter. Teach me to remember that I am not a slave to my negative emotions. Because of your Spirit, I can tell those emotions to be removed and turn my eyes to the things of you, instead. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Megan says
It’s so interesting how our perspective on things change as we get older. Sometimes for better and sometimes for worse. I love how you turned this completely on it’s head and made it positive.
Marva | SunSparkleShine says
I can’t wait to read the rest of this, Lauren. Hopping over to iBelieve right now.
Emily says
Amen. It’s so hard to not focus on the negatives, the things I could complain about, but that’s miserable … and it takes my eyes off of Jesus and His grace to us. I’ve been tempted actually to complain about not getting very much snow this winter here, but this was such a good reminder. Pray that I would have a good attitude about glorifying God no matter what!
Lori Schumaker says
Great post, my friend! I’m a Minnesota girl transported to sunny Arizona so I GET being over the winters! lol! They are BRUTAL! What solid advice, though, for keeping our thoughts on what is right and good ♥
Hugs,
Lori
Tiffany Parry says
Attitude checks are so necessary, and such a beautiful part of having honest relationship with God. It’s also the hard and humbling part, so there’s that too. 😉
Nicki Schroeder says
I love your heart and your prayer to help remind us to turn our frowns upside down! But honestly, Midwest girl here, winter is a bit harsh…so don’t be too hard on yourself! 🙂
Debbie Wicklund says
I just came across this today. Very timely for me. I too am not native to Minnesota but when I met online and married my Minnesota man almost 20 years ago, I had to move here from Florida. Yes, God does have a sense of humor. At first winter was fun, but now it just seems like a drag, just the icy or snowy roads/walkways. I don’t mind the cold. I fell on the ice four years ago, broke my ankle/leg & spent Christmas & New Year’s in a rehab center. Now this year I am battling cervical cancer & will spend Christmas & New Year’s near the U of M hospital so I can get radiation 5 days a week for 5-1/2 weeks. I trust the Lord to bring us through this & I’m not too scared, but I’m getting tired of putting on a smiling face so my friends/family don’t get worried or discouraged. So, I will take to heart this message you’ve written. I’m pretty sure the Lord had His hand in me seeing it.
Lauren says
Hi, dear Debbie. I’m so sorry to hear about the battle you are facing. Please know that I am praying for you!! You are not alone and you are loved so much!! God is with you, even now — especially now. XOXO
Ivey says
Love these … could u make them to be able to print them? Put in frames?
LaQueen Ellington says
It’s so encouraging to see how powerful God is and how he uses the very gifts he gives is to help others. How beutiful and divine it is that we as believers in God can use the World Wide Web to reach people all over the world! To God be the glory. Be blessed all of you in the mighty name of Jesus Christ. Amen