It was a Friday night at the end of a long and hard week. I stood over the kitchen sink, trying not to burst into tears or overthink. But no matter how many deep breaths I took, I couldn’t shake the heavy weight. I wanted to scream into a pillow or run until I reached a deserted place.
I closed my eyes and whispered, “Jesus help. Today wasn’t just hard. Today was blisteringly frustrating. Bewildering. Energy sapping. Rage inducing. I am exhausted mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and relationally. Please. Help.”
If any of this resonates with you in week or season you’re in right now, or you find yourself having a hard day later down the road, I hope the reminders He gave me will minister to your soul. Here’s what He said.
#1 Sometimes life feels hard. That’s OK.
It’s true, sometimes there is just no sugar coating it. But you can still look for the good in the hard. As I sensed the Lord encouraging me to look for the good, glimpses of beauty came to my remembrance.
Did my child whine all day and did work blow up in my face? Yes. Did several things get broken in my house and did I spend a large portion of the day cleaning up glass and other debris? Yes. Did my husband and I not communicate as lovingly and as well as we usually do? Yes. Did I not have a moment to myself? Yes. But then there was the moment my son ask me to hold him. The moment he gobbled up the soba noodles I made us for dinner with a half smile. The moment my dog nuzzled me with delight as I massaged his ears.
There was beauty and good in the hard. Maybe it didn’t outweigh the number of minutes of what felt really difficult, but it was there. Focusing on those moments and letting the rest fall to the wayside really helped put some things into perspective.
#2 Give yourself grace.
So you didn’t handle everything perfectly 100% of the time. It’s OK to acknowledge where you need to grow and improve, but you don’t need to beat yourself up about those things. Honestly, sometimes as women of faith, we extend more compassion to others than we do to ourselves.
God isn’t sitting on His throne wagging His finger at us saying “Shame on you, you should know better,” when we mess up. Yes, there is a place for correction and repentance, but also, if you’re yielded to and pursuing Jesus, cut yourself some slack. Sometimes, you’re going to mess up even when you’re trying to be the person you know God created you to be. Remember:
There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who do not walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has made me free from the law of sin and death. -Romans 8:1-2 NKJV
#3 Evaluate what needs to change.
When life feels hard, it’s important to look at what might be creating additional unneeded stress in your life. Your job, relationships, habits, etc. might be making things harder than they need to be.
Take a moment and ask the Lord, is there anything I need to change? Are there any relationships I need to set better boundaries around? What mindsets need sanctified in this season? You might be surprised by what He shows you.
#4 Make room for rest.
It’s estimated that the number of times rest is mentioned in the Bible ranges between 390 and 520, depending on the version. Rest is so important to God that not only did He Himself rest on the seventh day of creation, but He also constantly encouraged His people to incorporate rest into their daily lives all throughout the Bible.
You’re probably familiar with Matthew 11:28:30, where Jesus says, “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” One of my favorite verses on rest, however, is found in Mark 6:31:
“And He said to them, ‘Come aside by yourselves to a deserted place and rest a while.’ For there were many coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.”
Sometimes life isn’t just hard, it’s downright stressful. You might be in college struggling to keep up with homework and studying for looming exams. You might be a young mother struggling to take care of tiny humans, let alone yourself.
During days, weeks, months, years and seasons like this, it is even more important that we make room for rest in order to reset in His presence. Yes, God is always with us, but when we draw near and come aside by ourselves to intentionally rest with Him, we can experience Him in even more powerful and tangible ways as He fills us with what we need to keep going.
#5 Make room for fun.
We need to look no further than Proverbs 17:22 to know that laughter is good for the soul: “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” I know it may be hard to find a way to have fun or laugh right now, but I promise you, any effort made to lighten a heavy load is not made in vain.
I remember when I was walking through some of the darkest seasons of my life, my husband would try to snap me out of whatever funk I had fallen into by sending me funny videos on TikTok, or by encouraging me to do something for myself that at one point felt fun, even if I didn’t feel like doing it in that moment.
Even today, when I find myself having a difficult day, I’m intentional about making decisions that will allow my heart to stay in a place and joy and gratitude in the Lord and this beautiful life He has given me. Whether that is treating myself to a latte, going for a walk outside, cooking a new recipe, or writing in my journal, any moment set aside for pure enjoyment always helps to give me renewed strength and perspective.
Did these five reminders bless your heart today? Let me know in the comments below. And please, feel free to ask the Lord for more reminders if you need them. He loves to speak individually to each and every one of us!
Things might feel hard right now, but keep going. There is wonderful joy ahead. (see 1 Peter 1:6).
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