You know those moments when you can truly sense someone’s unconditional love for you? My husband has given me many moments like these, and there’s one in particular that I’ll never forget.
In January 2013, when I was in college, I contracted the worse stomach bug I’ve had in my entire life. (I will spare you the not-so-glamorous details.) After hours of being sick, he stayed by my side throughout the entire night. It didn’t matter how horrible I looked, or how loopy or lethargic I became, because in that moment, all that mattered was that I was still conscious — still the Lauren he knew and loved.
Three years later, as we battle my health problems together, my husband continues to be a constant support, companion, lover and friend. For this and so much more, he’s one of those people that I feel like I can truly be myself around. No matter what. I don’t have to put up a guard. I don’t have to put on an act. I don’t have to present myself all prim and proper in his presence. I can just be me. I can let my guard down, make funny faces, say silly things and live completely free.
It’s not that I don’t feel like I can be myself with the people I work with or run into at the grocery store. But the truth is they don’t know the whole story. They don’t know the real Lauren. And so that makes it hard to be totally real with them.
We can be true to ourselves in our workplaces and communities, but if we lack deep relationships that allow us to fully bring our guards down, our spirits will suffocate.
We all need people in our lives who know our story and know the real us.
Whether it’s being able to express our opinions openly, be silly or just be plain vulnerable, having people who respect and deeply know us gives us a safe place to live, rest and breathe. When the world gets heavy, and the other people in our life don’t seem to care, these kinds of relationships lift the weight off of our shoulders and help us forget about whatever is consuming our minds.
But there’s another place where we can freely experience this level of intimacy. A place that is always there — constant, stable and firm. And that place is found in a relationship with Jesus Christ.
In Matthew 11:28, Jesus says “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Jesus offers us a place to live, rest and breathe. A place that’s even more rejuvenating than the places we find ourselves in with our loved ones. A safe haven where it doesn’t matter if we look or speak properly, it just matters that we are His — the person he created, knows and loves.
This is where we can bring our guards down and be seen and loved for who we really are — a child of God. His arms are always open. His promises are always true. And in His presence, we can be the unfiltered version of ourselves. We can be honest. We can tell him exactly how we feel. We can give ourselves some breathing room. We can ask for help. And we can truly be at peace.
When I was younger, I used to think I had to get myself in order before coming to Jesus. I had to finish crying and put on a brave face. I had to edit what I said in prayer. But as I’ve grown in my relationship with Him, I now know that He doesn’t want a cleaned up version of me. He wants and loves the real me. And He wants and loves the real you, too.
Here’s my challenge for each of us this week: Let’s set aside some time for authentic living. Let’s invest in the relationships that allow us to be our true selves. Let’s not be afraid to let others and let Jesus into our mess. Let’s be honest people who are full of grace and truth. Be-you-tiful.
Lauren- this was such an encouraging post for my soul this morning! And I’m so thankful we have a Father that we can just be ourselves around, too!
Dearest Shannon, I am so glad this post could speak to you today! Have a lovely week being YOU-tiful!
This was encouraging. I had a delightful morning coffee with my closest girlfriend. Realized that we can just be ourselves, laugh, cry, whatever. It is so comfortable, comforting, and joy-inspiring. 🙂 Glad I have that with my husband as well.
Hi, Betsy. What a gift it is to have Earthly relationships where we can truly be ourselves. Glad you got some girl time in this morning. Have a blessed week!
I think that is one of my favourite things about God. That we can be completely true to our messy, ugly selves and he loves us regardless. It makes absolutely no sense but it is wonderful.
Me too, dear friend! Love and hugs to you!
It’s so freeing to know we can let our guard down and be ourselves. I love the comparison with how your husband loves you and sees the real you. I feel the same way with my husband. I’m so thankful that God loves us no matter what.
God is so good to us in giving us spouses who love us just the way we are! So thankful!
Amen! There is no safer place to be honest and real than before the God who loves us through and through. I think practicing authenticity there only makes it easier to live it out before others. Great encouragement here, Lauren. And three cheers for supportive husbands who love us no matter how messy we get! 🙂
I couldn’t agree more, Tiffany. Hope you’re having a great week!
So TRUE, my beautiful friend, Lauren! It kills the spirit not to be authentic and we all need those we can be real with – grateful for my man- in- plaid and my siblings where we shared authentically all weekend long – what a blessing and a nurturing to our souls – great post!
Amen! So glad you had a good time with your sibs. 🙂
I’m so blessed with a husband like that, too, Lauren. Sometimes it feels like he knows me better than I do myself. 🙂 But there is no one who knows us like Jesus, is there? I’m so grateful for having such a Safe Haven in Him. As a child, I saw Him as an angry God who was always ready to punish me. I’m glad I have learned He is not that. He is such an inviting, loving God who wants us to pour out everything to Him. And without judgment, He takes us into His arms and wipes our tears and understands. I’m still a work-in-progress in being the real me around most people, but I’m learning step by step. Thank you so much for this encouragement! I love the graphics and their messages, too! Blessings and hugs to you!
Dear Trudy, thanks for stopping by the blog! It’s been awhile since we connected. <3 I hope you are doing well. Hugs to you!!
Amen, Lauren!
He loves us just like we are! I love this!
Great quote, “We can be ourselves with Jesus — we don’t have to put on an act.”
Thanks for sharing this sweet word today!
YES! So thankful for this truth!
Oh yes, it seems that I am on a continual journey of learning that Jesus loves the real inner me. Lately I have been hearing Him speak those very words to me as I deal with Chronic Illness also. What a blessing to have a husband who encourages us in that walk! I’m thankful to be your neighbor over at #LiveFreeThursday this week!
I think you’re exactly right about the continual journey thing … I think it’s an ongoing process we go through as we continue to grow closer and closer to Christ. I will be praying for you, sweet friend, as you continue to lean more into His love.
Lauren, this is written for me. I self-doubt far too often. I have a husband who is a gift from God and who loves me as I am. I feel so blessed. Much of my life I lived in doubt because too many people had put me down and I accepted there words as true. I became squished and had a hard time feeling unsquished…until I came into the arms of Jesus and my husband. Both at the same time, almost. So I am blessed, but I still have those old tapes playing. Satan loves to bring me down and into doubt. So thank you for reminding me of the true love that I am beheld in.
Dearest Linda, I will be praying against these feelings of self doubt that the enemy has been using against you. I pray that God would whisper love songs to your heart and wrap you with His holy confidence. <3 Be blessed, sister!
Love this reminder.
Thank you, dear Bonnie!
The blessing in this is that you married a man who allows you to be comfortable just being you. Me too. It’s one of the things I love most about him. this should be a quality we teach young women and girls to always look for in a husband❤️
Amen to that, Mindy! I am so blessed by my husband. And you’re right — we definitely need to be teaching young women to look for a man who treats them the same way.
I totally feel with you … I have had health problems for the last 7 years and I know what it’s like. Not able to be your true self because people don’t understand what you’re going through. I am however, to have a few blessed relationships where I can be my real self and they are incredible! It’s hard to let your guard down but that’s when they truly flourish! – oh and when they’re built on Christ too! So glad I found your beautiful blog! 🙂
Hi Sam! I am sorry to hear about your health problems. I will most certainly be praying for healing in that situation!! Wondering if you’d be willing to share your story as part of a new series I’m starting in 2017 called “My Positively Lovely Story?” You can learn more at laurengaskillinspires.com/positively-lovely-community.